Ooooooh!!!! Lutefisk!!!!!! We knew we caught the 'scent' of something as we headed westerly into a headwind from the states -- got the first wiff somewhere east of Iceland and when we landed in Salt Lake we were amazed to see 'herds' of skunks, noses in the air & uplifted tails wagging, heading to the northwest.
Then we saw a fleet of Volvos bound nor'west. We knew they were going to your the lutefisk meal you are preparing, since we saw they were sporting bumper stickers:
"Legalize Lutefisk!"
"Days of ease and nights of pleasure, Roger's lutefisk surpasses measure"
"May your lutefisk be flakier than your friends"
"You say, Uff Da when it goes down. And Fee DA when it returns."
We thought we saw Dusty in one of the cars, so called over asking, "What time does it start, Dusty?" He replied, "5 o'clock, but better come at 4:30 to get some. Remember the old Norwegian saying, 'Erly birdin ut letefisk, den dees." ("The early bird catches the lutefisk, then dies.").
Some of you may not know what is this delicacy, consumed usually only at Christmas by Scan-da-hoovians (Some of those folks, perhaps like Roger, imbibe a bit too much aquavit and forget to turn the pages of their calenders -- and have lutefisk in March).
First, the origin of lutefisk: The gentle fishing folk of Scotland, in the old days, before the discovery of what happens to malted grain left lying around in the cellar, used to be famous for their cod. When the Vikings invaded, to get rid of the surly mob, the Scots decided to lace the cod the Vikings were stealing from the pantry with lye (a useful rat poison, sometimes used to clean the outhouse). The resulting horrific gelatinous oily goo, oozing a rancid foul stench, was seemingly a perfect Viking repellant ... well, that's how it got started and the Vikings have been relishing it since (this is either a reflection of their esophageal constitutions or their cranial structure).
So what's it taste like? Hard to describe, so an analogy might work --
Two people meet on the street. A question is asked, "How was the colonoscopy?" If the person asking and asked have both had the experience, a nod will suffice in answer. If the asker is uninitiated, there will be no words sufficient in answer. Same with lutefisk.
In line with a recent post about the activity of environmentally-concerned citizens in the Pacific NW, we should let all know that there will be a march on Roger's place tomorrow by the greens supported by the F.D.A. -- they have received a report about his producing a vile toxic waste -- and that he will even be passing it off as food!
Now, pub mates, I hope this makes a lot of scents. And an old family toast to you, Roger -- "Here's to cold nights, warm friends, and lutefisk to serve them!" (Now, aren't you glad we're back, Roger)