Greetings C-Brats -- apologize for a long entry after a long hiatus, but I think you will enjoy this.
Last Sunday I was out solo revisiting local haunts -- looking at all the boats in the Washington Channel, watching crew races on the "mighty" Anacostia, and cruising the Potomac upstream all the way to Chain Bridge. On my way back from there, just as I slowly passed the Key Bridge, I saw a guy in the water who looked odd - he was holding onto a piece of driftwood and wearing something, but not a PFD.
Me: "Hey Buddy! Are you all right?"
Him: "I'm just swimming here and no one can take that away from me...[babble]...and it don't cost nothing...[babble, babble]"
Me: "Can I give you a lift?"
Him: "Uh...Could you take my shoes? I think they're weighing me down, and I borrowed them and don't want to lose them...[babble, babble]"
Me (pulling alongside): "Sure...but why don't you climb aboard. And what have you got there?"
Him: "These are my important papers...[babble]...and my books... I've got 'em in a milk crate wrapped up in a garbage bag so they won't get wet."
So I get this fellow on board and he's wearing a full-cut synthetic leather jacket that must have weighed 50 pounds wet and he's got a milk crate with soaked, heavy papers inside. His name is Melvin, about 30 years old, and he's friendly and exuberant in a kind of crazy, I've-been-living-outside-on-my-own for-a-long-time, sort of way. He is the first homeless guy I've ever encountered in the water.
He strips down to his underwear and wrings out his shirt, shorts, and jacket as I head over to the Georgetown waterfront dock. All the weekend see-and-be-seen folks' boats are occupying the dock, so I pull up to the space reserved for the commercial tour boats.
Me: "Melvin, gotta get your stuff together -- I can't stay here for long."
Melvin: "Thanks for the lift buddy. I'll get dressed on the pier -- the cops don't like you to be naked around here!"
Me: "Be well Melvin. God's speed."
So off he goes and off I go. 15 minutes later, I am just about at the end of Hains Point, near National Airport, and three emergency boats (police, fire & rescue, and Coast Guard) have passed me with their lights flashing. Over the radio, CG broadcasts: "Pon Pon - we have a report of a person in the water near the Key Bridge. All boaters in the vicinity be on the lookout and report any sightings on channel one-six."
Uh oh.
Me (on radio): "Coast Guard, this is vessel Otter with possible information about man in water at Key Bridge." (CG responds and we switch to channel 22 where I report where and when I picked up Melvin and where I dropped him off.)
Two of the emergency boats came back and took my report. Someone had apparently seen Melvin in the water and thought he'd jumped from the bridge.
But I think he was just out for a swim on a beautiful day. In his coat. With his milk crate. Because, after all, it don't cost nothin'!