"I hardly knew ye"

D

dotnmarty

New member
My next door neighbor passed away last night. She had fought a 10 year battle with cancer. I have lived in this house for 5 years. I didn't know her well at all. She had I think, three girls, all in their 20's. Sometime her old hounddog, Elvis, was a pain, especially when he'd escaped through an open gate and his howling would awaken my sleeping granddaughter. Sometime, I criticized her parenting skills (in my thoughts, never outloud) especially when I would see the kids leave the newspapers in the driveway for her to pick up or leave the garbage cans for her to put out and bring in. A couple of the girls I wouldn't recognize if we were in the same line at the market. I was never in her house and she was never in mine. We did accept packages for each other. A few weeks ago she brought over gift box of strawberries and chocolates that was dropped off there when we were out. It must have weighed 25 lbs. She looked ill and frail when she rang our doorbell, but she was smiling. She always smiled. We were 'yard friends'. There is no fence between our property and we would often speak about the weather and plants while I raked and she puttered in her yard. Tonight I dropped off a couple of trays of sandwiches and finger foods. The daughters who came to the door seemed surprised and appreciative. I did it because I remembered how much I appreciated it when my dad died and I was about their age. I am rather surprised at how deeply her passing has affected me-surprised, and, in a sense, grateful.
 
Sorry for your loss Marty. 10 years is a very, very long fight. I know she feels better now and the pain is over. My Father's fight was only 30 days after it was found. We hated to loose him, but we were glad to see his pain stop. It takes events like this as to keep us focused on what we have and fun times, and forget about some of the trivial thins others say and do.

To Good Neighbors & Boating Friends :beer :beer Here here!!

Byrdman
 
Death is something we all must confront and as sad as it is it can be a beautiful experience. Most of my family passed away suddenly while I was far from home working. In my mothers case I had her with me for three years before she passed from colon cancer. She was diagnosed at 83 with inoperable cancer and chose not to take radiation or chemo. Along with the help of hospice my daughter and I cared for her in that last year at my home. For me it was like a role reversal. That lady that had been so strong all my life was now dependant on me for her everyday needs. Her mind started failing her and she sometimes thought I was my dad. That last year with her was the most rewarding year of my life and it's something I'll leave this world with.
In the case of your neighbor it just shows how our day to day encounters with people we barely know can have a lasting effect on us.
 
Marvin- We had a similar experience with my mother, who lived with us during her last 10 years. . I remember her last few days in the hospital. They were beautiful. She had a living will and was very peaceful, all loaded up on morphine and whatnot. The hospital staff was wonderful in their caring for her and for us. Now I notice my kids, both in their forties, are starting to be quite paternalistic in their reactions to me. "Please dad, don't go near that chain saw", etc. On the other hand, Lizzie and I do enjoy our icecream and watching 'Reading Rainbow'!
 
Back
Top